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Showing posts with label drama. Show all posts
Showing posts with label drama. Show all posts

Monday, 27 January 2014

University secrets II



Here we go again... 

Yes, after the very popular University secrets post, it is time for another.

It has been seven months since I posted that one and all in all not much has changed, apart from the fact we are all out of halls and I occasionally wear a yellow top, emblazoned with my nickname "Mary Poppins", giving out kitkats.

Ahh second year...

"this year actually counts doesn't it"
"we got a 2.2 on an assignment - I'm going to fail in life" 
"remind me again why I signed up to this module... actually just this course in general?!"

"is our lecturer speaking in English?"

We have officially moved on from the start of First year, but that just means more to report on... 

Type "University Secrets" into google and you'll get everyuni.ac.uk telling you how to have a successful University career. Bull.

We know how to get our firsts and our two ones, what no one tells you about is University life, the nitty gritty - I'm not talking about secret spilling, I'm talking about those mad things that the people you live with do, where you wonder what planet some people were born on and the strange behaviours of your fellow colleagues at 3am after four too many sambucas. 

The constant, on going blah at Uni is the North South divide - I wrote a post on what the North taught me (I should have called it what Newcastle has taught me) but that was controversial in itself. I am from Derbyshire, you cannot get more central than central. The middle ground, the all round diplomat, I see good things and bad things about the North and the South. However, this isn't the case of Northerners and Southerners (there are a few exceptions - i.e. those that don't care). In the first week at University it was all about the North vs. the South, in fact if you get the wrong people together the debate still goes on. I'm talking accent throwing, job hunting, money, lifestyle... the list goes on. I personally prefer waking up to a field of sheep that end up packed in Sainsburys. But really, the North/South debate is refereed by the Midlanders. 

Cooking - finding out who can cook and who can't is an interesting time. I'm not talking my mother's definition of cooking which means turning on an oven and baking a potato and opening a can of tuna and being able to grate cheese without cutting a finger and working out how a microwave works. Microwaves, they have been my biggest cause for concern over two years. The people will know that I'm talking about them, I won't name drop. But one time (in Barker block), the place was almost set on fire by a young man trying to cook rice in a metal pan, by placing it in the microwave - lets just say I wasn't best pleased and corrected the cooking technique and then suggested he tries boil in a bag. There have been occasions of putting crisp packets in a microwave after too many beers at 4am - sparks were flying. There are poor souls in this world who don't have microwaves, so when faced with one, it can be quite daunting. Especially when a packet says "Cat E 4 mins, Cat D 5 mins, High Power 2 mins" - note, this does not mean you cook your food for 11 minutes - no no. It means you look at your microwave and check its power and then cook at the specified time. Top tip.

Reppin' -Ahh, becoming a rep, a right of passage that everyone should try. I'd think carefully about what type of rep you want to be, or should I say what you don't mind doing in front of people, because when it comes to hustings, there is no dignity, you have just go crazy to get the votes. Or take a more introvert way and become a welfare rep. I've written loads of posts about the first few weeks of my second year running after freshers and having A&E trips - but it is all part of the experience... although not so when they bring through the defib... awks.
Being a welfare rep also means looking after fresher and ticket reps - thats a non verbally expressed term of the contract (wheyy Business Law) - it is just an assumed thing and it needs to be done.
Rep training week consisted of making up hand shakes and presenting them to the rest of the rep team, participating in very drunken pub golf where many people did not play by the rules and a few mornings hungover.
Then the fresh blood arrived, manic hit.
International students may as well have got on a plane and gone to Mars speaking to Aliens because we were not getting through (Well I certainly wasn't)
Bags were lost at airports, we had to ferry around taxis, coaches and mislaid defrosting bacon.
The home students arrived two days later, more madness. The reps were incredible though, everyone was so hands on and the girls just basically admitted they couldn't lift a fly, so it was obviously the boys' job to take the 50kg suitcases up two flights of stairs - there's equality for you
Female reps were warned to stay away from Fresh girls arriving - as I did, gingerly...
The first night was the launch night - we had to go around our block to motivate everyone to go down and get drunk.
I knocked on one boys door (I don't know his name, probably a good thing), he had a girl on his bed - I thought that was rather soon so just stood there frozen, lost all professionalism and was like errr are you two coming to the launch? To which they looked at me like I'd disturbed their wedding night. Then another rep arrived for me to find out that this guy had been training with DU Rugby over the summer and that it was his girlfriend, whom he was dropping off home that night - phewww, I was thinking that hook-up was one for the record books (sorry for disturbing who ever you are!x).



Strange behaviour/ other randomness not previously stated
I'll just list this 


  • Buying a bath for your communal kitchen area was controversial (although I'm sure very fun) the porters weren't best pleased mind. ("Mind"?! who am I?! it just sounded right in the sentence)
  • Playing musical instruments at 3am was fairly normal, annoying, but normal, specifically around exam times.
  • Going on city trips to relive your freshers year, I will be a fresher again!!! - then ending up almost dying from alcohol poisoning
  • Entering into your old block pretending like you still live there and have a block party 
  • Never have I ever becomes much more difficult to lie as everyone knows what everyone has done by now 
  • Nothing is a secret in second year - no sneaking around corridors at 4am!
  • Flat/house parties in the first term are purely for checking out the competition
  • Secrets don't remain secrets in year 2, well some do, if you're clever in whom you tell, i.e. your rabbit 200 miles away - Thanks Gaga. 
  • Did we ever find out who the Gossip Girl Twitter accounts belonged to?
Be good
RHS x
 








Saturday, 19 October 2013

When 20 becomes 30 and 30 becomes 40

I'm nearly 20 (precisely 8 weeks today) which as I keep saying to people means I'll be nearly 30 which then means I'll be nearly 40 which by then I'll have minus two kids (the kids I would have had if I hadn't been climbing a career ladder) and I'll be happily single with a cat called Elliott (if its a boy or Felicity if its a girl- the names I would have called my children). 

So "nearly" meaning "almost" or "fairly close to" -  I know there is a decade between 20 and 30 and 30 and 40 (A in GCSE Maths, not many people can say that you know) however to me that will be the next milestone and ever since Jennifer Garner was in 13 going on 30 I never could wait to be 30 (flirty and thriving, say it with me!). Now however at the tender, ripening (no really, crows feet, expensive eye concealer, firming body lotion) age of 19 I am nearly (that word again) half way through my degree, which two mornings ago I questioned where a year has gone - seriously who do I write to about this. I hope its not RBS. 

So we lead onto another thing. RBS. I'm turning into my grandmother (she's 70, I'm 19 going on 70, it gets better doesn't it) and she always told me to have one bank, which I did till I was 14 and wanted a debit card (basically my portal to buying Topshop, or the 1/5095th I could afford, which was great because at 14 I was a tidy 6 and oh does Topshop love to serve the skinny, as we learn as we turn 16, 17, "oh my I'm curvy" 18, "time to become a 10" 19). I'm getting sidetracked; RBS want me to write in to close my bank account, in this day and age. As Natalie said "where is my owl". "write in" who do they think I am?! I'll write an email and write in a letter of complaint. 

Where was I? I'm currently having a conversation (Facebook Mail, who has time to meet and talk anymore?!) with someone (might be Mike) about how I don't go out much (its been 2 weeks of actual term and I have been out three times now I think that is me going slightly crazy and has lead to me assess my mental health however to most students that is a dismal effort and probably brands me with a 3rd class honours and leads to several forfeits). Who wants to go out anyway when you can read Charlotte Brontë or watch a Sarah Jessica Parker film and drink dandelion and burdock tea (with a hint of peppermint). Ok its official I am getting slightly boring but I want a good degree and a good CV and good skin when I'm 40 - you don't want to know what all the sugar in alcoholic drinks does to your skin, after all 40 is just around the corner - I'm halfway there! (nearly). Don't worry I'm going out on Thursday AND Saturday next week! (I'll be careful).

Anyway, this was my break from reading about how Japan have outdone the U.S. in manufacturing by keeping costs low etc and how Darwin has explained why we prefer to eat sugar and fat. 

I'll let you decide which is the most interesting

Rant over
RHS x

P.S. If anyone missed JD and Mike's heart to heart in Storytellers on Thursday please ask them to reenact it - it was beautiful.

Wednesday, 31 July 2013

University secrets

This could be interesting... 

Durham University, Queens Campus, Stockton-on-Tees (yep, the North East - don't knock it!) 


"where's all the fit lads?" 
"why is it 78.4% girls?"- the questions all the girls were asking each other 

"I'm in heaven"
"where did I store my condoms?" - what the lads were saying 

its University, most people meet the person they spend the rest of their lives with at uni, of course this is what people were thinking! 

Never have I ever 

Ok, it took me several weeks to understand the rules of this game 
NB: drink when you HAVE done what someone says they "never have" 

(there have been occasions when I have drank to things such as "never have I ever had a threesome" - I haven't, honest) 

This game often involved many people "dropping out" at certain points, 
especially when one boy dropped the "never have I ever masturbated" bomb - silence (at least wait till year 2 for those types!) 

Can you keep a secret?

Wow, the times I have heard this, 
"of course" - the majority of people do! 

Any juicy gossip? - no chance and I mean NO CHANCE. 
keep things to yourself as much as you can, I definitely learned that way! 
choose your 'secret keepers' wisely

Gossip Girl

Yes, really, a Durham University Gossip Girl Twitter account was set up, I was a suspect (just because my window was perfectly positioned to see most goings on - it wasn't me, unfortunately!) 

This caused uproar! 
It was publicly posted when X was seen leaving Y's block etc... you get the picture. 

Again, being an undercover agent is best at Uni, 

The "Who can sleep with the whole of campus" game 

I didn't enter, I was too busy revising all the time, yep all the time - even at Christmas when we didn't even have exams 

Some people got a reputation though - if you're a lad, great (not really, but whatever), if you're a girl, oh dear. 

BUT - as I say (you may quote me) "Those that matter don't mind and those that mind, don't matter" (Smith, R. 2013) 

You're friends won't care who you get around with - makes nights in much more interesting (or the morning afters, or tbh that night after the action!!) 

Just try not to upset people - I've seen it happen and its a dog eat dog world (or lad sleeps with girl, is a prick, moves on, girls gets upset - standard, but sad) 

NB: twister? its never twister... where is there space to fit a twister mat? - exactly! 

Best time ever (not best song ever)

It is literally amazing at Uni, everyone should go, just for the experience (life that is!)

It goes far too fast though. And now, onto the second year, I'm hoping and praying (please God) that the partying does continue and the friends keep on coming! (as in, I get more, friends that is, jeez)

  • Middlesbrough Empire Saturdays - wow, keep dancing till 4am 
  • Photo bomb as many pictures as you can - especially in freshers
  • Try anything! (except that - you might hurt yourself)
  • Take Berocca - or grow an orangery 
  • Don't pay for a TV license in halls (naughty) 

RHS x